Paladino contemplates quiet, private life

Democratic candidate and all-around sex god Andrew Cuomo has defeated Tea Party insurgent Carl Paladino to become the next governor of New York.

Kooky Carl said some hurtful things about gays but will no doubt blame the media for his loss. After a heated argument with New York Post reporter Fredric Dicker, he vowed to make up over a nice dinner, saying “I’ll take you out.”

Really? Aw, thanks Carl!

Cuomo’s pops held the seat between 1983 and 1994.

Paladino contemplates quiet private life